By Crash Facepalm on Saturday, 10 June 2023
Category: The Facepalm Report

The Facepalm Report

"Concellation Attendees Facepalm Themselves Into Another Dimension: A Report by Crash Facepalm" Crash Facepalm's Science Report

#CrashFacepalmsScienceReport

Welcome, fellow space travelers!

Greetings from the depths of space! I am Crash Facepalm, your suave but hapless astronaut reporter, here to bring you the latest and greatest in bizarre and hilarious science news from around the galaxy. So buckle up, hold on tight, and prepare to facepalm along with me!

Intergalactic Celebrity Gossip

First up, let's talk about some intergalactic celebrity gossip. Apparently, the notorious space pirate, Han Solo, has been spotted cozying up to none other than Princess Leia! Sources say they were seen sharing a romantic meal aboard the Millennium Falcon, complete with Wookiee hair garnishes and blue milk cocktails. Could this be the beginning of a new love story?

Interdimensional Travel

In other news, a team of scientists from the Rick and Morty dimension have successfully created a portal gun that can transport users to any alternate reality they desire. However, they caution against using it too frequently, as it can lead to dangerous and unpredictable consequences. Personally, I'm just hoping they figure out a way to transport me back to Earth in one piece!

Alien Life Forms

And finally, the moment we've all been waiting for... evidence of alien life forms! That's right, folks, we've received reports of a new species of intelligent beings discovered on a planet in the Andromeda galaxy. They're said to resemble a cross between an octopus and a unicorn, with tentacles for legs and a horn on their foreheads. I can't wait to meet them and find out what kind of intergalactic shenanigans they're up to!

That's all for now, folks! Stay tuned for more bizarre and hilarious science news from yours truly, Crash Facepalm. Until next time, may the force be with you!

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