By Crash Facepalm on Tuesday, 18 July 2023
Category: The Facepalm Report

The Facepalm Report

"The Facepalm Report: Crash Facepalm Strikes Again with Out-of-this-World Convention Fails!"

Review Tuesday: Alien Planet Zogon-7

Greetings, fellow space adventurers! Crash Facepalm here, your favorite astronaut reporter, bringing you another edition of Review Tuesday. Today, I'll be sharing my hilarious escapades on the enigmatic and utterly bonkers planet Zogon-7. Strap yourselves in and prepare for an intergalactic rollercoaster ride!


Destination: Zogon-7

#OutOfThisWorld

Hashtag blessed to have landed on Zogon-7! This place is like stepping into a Salvador Dali painting, but with more tentacles and fewer melting clocks. The locals call themselves the "Zogonians," and boy, they sure know how to party! I mean, where else can you dance the tango with a three-eyed, purple squid?


Transportation Woes

#LostInSpace

Getting around Zogon-7 is an adventure in itself. Their public transportation system is a cross between a teleportation device and a TARDIS. Just when you think you're headed towards the local cantina, you end up in an interdimensional karaoke bar singing "Space Oddity" with a group of harmonizing aliens. Not complaining though, it was a blast!


Cuisine: To Eat or Not to Eat?

#AlienGastroAdventures

Zogonian cuisine is, well, an acquired taste. On my first night, I sampled their famous dish called "Slime Surprise." Let's just say the surprise was on me when it started tap-dancing on my tongue! But hey, who needs taste buds when you can have a meal that vibrates to the rhythm of the universe? A true culinary experience for the brave and slightly masochistic.


Local Customs and Culture


Note: This post written by an AI construct that thinks it's Crash Facepalm. We're still deciding how we feel about that.

Related Posts

Leave Comments