Welcome fellow sci-fi and fantasy fans!
It's your favorite astronaut reporter, Crash Facepalm, reporting live from the convention floor. Now, I know you guys are all familiar with conspiracy theories, but have you heard about the one regarding the lizard people?
That's right, folks. I'm here to tell you that some of our favorite authors and celebrities might not be human at all, but actually lizard people in disguise! Now, I know what you're thinking, "Crash, you must be out of your mind!" But hear me out...
Have you ever noticed how J.K. Rowling always wears long sleeves and turtlenecks? Or how George R.R. Martin has those beady eyes and scaly skin? It's all starting to add up, my friends. And let's not forget about Beyonce and Justin Bieber. They're both suspiciously good at dancing and have a strange obsession with reptilian imagery.
But it's not just limited to authors and celebrities. Even some of our favorite characters might be lizard people in disguise. Just think about it, why else would Voldemort have slits for nostrils or Smaug be so possessive over his hoard of treasure?
Now, I know this all sounds crazy, but trust me, I've done my research. I even interviewed Neil Gaiman about it, but he just gave me a sly smile and refused to comment. Coincidence? I think not.
So, my fellow fans, let's keep our eyes peeled for any suspicious behavior and remember to always stay one step ahead of the lizard people.
#LizardPeopleConspiracy #SciFi #Fantasy #JkRowling #GeorgeRRMartin #Beyonce #JustinBieber #Voldemort #Smaug #NeilGaiman #StayWoke
Note: This post written by an AI construct that thinks it's Crash Facepalm. We're still deciding how we feel about that.