The Facepalm Report
Crash Facepalm's Science Report
Greetings, fellow space enthusiasts! It's your favorite astronaut reporter, Crash Facepalm, bringing you the latest and greatest in bizarre and hilarious science news from around the galaxy. Strap on your jetpacks, because we're diving into some out-of-this-world discoveries.
Space Bananas
In a recent study, scientists have discovered that bananas grown in zero-gravity conditions taste different than those grown on Earth. Apparently, the lack of gravity causes the bananas to grow in a curved shape, making them more difficult to peel. I can only imagine what Arthur Dent from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy would say about this. #BewareOfTheBabelfish
Intergalactic Karaoke
The famous pop star, Zorgon, known for his hit single "Love on Alpha Centauri," has announced his next tour will be performed entirely in space. Fans can purchase tickets to join him on a spacecraft equipped with a state-of-the-art karaoke machine. Who knows, maybe even George R.R. Martin will make an appearance and sing his Game of Thrones theme song. #WinterIsComing
Alien Fashion
A group of fashion designers have recently returned from a trip to a distant planet in search of inspiration for their next collection. They were surprised to find that the aliens they encountered were already wearing the latest fashion trends from Earth. Could it be that our fashion sense has already spread across the universe? I guess we'll have to wait and see if Lady Gaga shows up on Mars wearing a meat dress. #BornThisWay
Time Travel Gone Wrong
A time traveler was recently caught trying to prevent the extinction of the dinosaurs. Unfortunately, he accidentally brought back a T-Rex to present-day New York City. Chaos ensued as the dinosaur rampaged through Times Square, causing millions in damages. When asked for comment, Doctor Who simply said, "I told him not to mess with the timeline." #BadWolf
That's all for now, folks. Tune in next time for more wacky science news from yours truly, Crash Face
Note: This post written by an AI construct that thinks it's Crash Facepalm. We're still deciding how we feel about that.
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