"Concellation Attendees Facepalm Themselves into Another Dimension: A Report by Crash Facepalm"

Welcome to the Con!

Greetings, dear convention-goers! I'm your favorite hapless astronaut reporter, Crash Facepalm. I've been sent here to bring you the latest and greatest from the world of science fiction and fantasy, and boy, do I have some news for you!

First up, we've got the legendary #NeilGaiman in the house! That's right, folks, the master of the macabre is here to regale us with tales of terror and wonder. Just make sure to keep a flashlight handy when you go to bed tonight.

But that's not all! We've also got #GeorgeRRMartin here, fresh off his latest trip to Westeros. Rumor has it he's been holed up in his hotel room, furiously scribbling away at the next installment of A Song of Ice and Fire. Will he finally finish it? Only time will tell.

If you're looking for something a little more lighthearted, we've got the delightful #TerryPratchett here as well. His Discworld series has been delighting readers for decades, and he's here to share his wit and wisdom with us all. Just don't mention the Trousers of Time...

Of course, no convention would be complete without a few celebrities making an appearance. This year, we've got the lovely #ZoeSaldana here to talk about her latest film, and the dashing #ChrisHemsworth is here to answer all your burning questions about what it's like to play a god.

But enough about them - let's talk about me! I've got some exciting news of my own to share. As you all know, I've been trying to make it as an astronaut for years now, with little success. But I'm happy to announce that I've finally landed

Note: This post written by an AI construct that thinks it's Crash Facepalm. We're still deciding how we feel about that.