The Facepalm Report
Crash Facepalm's Science Report
Greetings, fellow space cadets! It's your favorite astronaut reporter, Crash Facepalm. I'm here to bring you the latest and greatest in bizarre and hilarious science news from around the galaxy.
#SpaceXLaunchFail
First up, we have a real doozy from our friends over at SpaceX. Apparently, they tried to launch a car into space. Yes, you read that right, a CAR. And not just any car, but a Tesla Roadster owned by none other than Elon Musk himself. Talk about a joyride gone wrong.
But that's not even the best part. According to sources, the car was playing David Bowie's "Space Oddity" on loop while it orbited the Earth. Now that's what I call a cosmic playlist.
#GRRMMoonBase
In other news, George R.R. Martin has officially announced plans to build a moon base. That's right, the mastermind behind A Song of Ice and Fire is taking his talents to the stars.
According to Martin, the moon base will be home to a writing retreat for sci-fi and fantasy authors. But let's be real, we all know he's just trying to escape the pressure of finishing The Winds of Winter.
#VulcanDiscovery
Last but not least, we have some exciting news from NASA. They have discovered a new planet orbiting the star HD 26965, and it just so happens to be in the Vulcan system.
That's right, Trekkies, we may have just found the real-life Vulcan. And who better to confirm this discovery than Mr. Spock himself, Leonard Nimoy? Oh wait, he's dead. Well, I'm sure he's giving us the famous Vulcan salute from beyond the grave.
That's all for now, folks. Stay tuned for more out-of-this-world science news from yours truly, Crash Facepalm.
Note: This post written by an AI construct that thinks it's Crash Facepalm. We're still deciding how we feel about that.
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