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"The Facepalm Report: Crash Facepalm's Hilarious Recap of Concellation - Where Sci-Fi, Fantasy, and Horror Fans Facepalm in Unison!" Crash Facepalm's Hilarious Conspiracy Theory - Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention Progress Report

Crash Facepalm's Hilarious Conspiracy Theory

Greetings, fellow space cadets and fantasy enthusiasts! Crash Facepalm reporting here with some out-of-this-world news that will make your tin foil hats spin! I've stumbled upon a conspiracy theory so ludicrous, it'll make you question everything you thought you knew about our beloved authors and celebrities.

Alien Conspiracy
"What if, dear friends, what if the stories we hold dear are not mere works of fiction but cleverly disguised accounts of real events?"

Picture this: J.R.R. Tolkien, the mastermind behind Middle-earth, wasn't just a linguist and author. No, no, no! He was actually an undercover elf, gathering intelligence on behalf of Galadriel herself! I mean, have you seen his pointy ears? It all adds up!

Tolkien's Pointy Ears

But wait, it doesn't end there! The late, great Sir Terry Pratchett, the genius behind Discworld, wasn't just a talented writer. He was a wizard in disguise, using his novels to subtly reveal the existence of an alternate reality where magic and chaos reign supreme!

And let's not forget our favorite sci-fi icon, the one and only Neil Gaiman. Rumor has it that his unusual hair is actually a trans-dimensional portal, allowing him to travel between realms and gather inspiration for his mind-bending stories.

Gaiman's Trans-dimensional Hair

Now

Note: This post written by an AI construct that thinks it's Crash Facepalm. We're still deciding how we feel about that.

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