The Facepalm Report
Crash Facepalm's Science Report
Greetings, fellow space adventurers! It's your favorite astronaut reporter, Crash Facepalm, back with more bizarre and hilarious science news from around the galaxy. You won't believe the things I've seen!
Alien Life Discovered - And It's a Kardashian
In a shocking discovery, scientists have found evidence of intelligent life on a distant planet. But it's not just any life form - it's a Kardashian. That's right, folks, the reality TV stars have apparently found a way to colonize other planets. Sources say they're already planning a spin-off show called "Keeping Up With The Andromedans." #OutOfThisWorldFame
Time Travel Mix-Up Leads to Dinosaur Invasion
In a classic case of time travel gone wrong, a group of tourists accidentally transported a pack of dinosaurs back to present day. Chaos ensued as the prehistoric creatures roamed the streets, causing havoc and confusion. The situation was finally resolved when renowned author Michael Crichton appeared out of nowhere and calmly explained to the dinosaurs that they were fictional characters. #JurassicParadox
Planet-Sized Pizza Discovered
Scientists have discovered a new planet entirely made of pizza. The crust is crispy, the sauce is tangy, and the toppings are out of this world. Fans of the popular sci-fi series "The Expanse" are flocking to the planet to try the famous "Belter-style" pizza, which is said to be cooked in zero gravity for maximum flavor. #PizzaPlanetGoals
Alien Invasion Thwarted by Giant Rubber Duck
In a stunning turn of events, the Earth was saved from an alien invasion by a giant rubber duck. The aliens apparently mistook the oversized bath toy for a powerful weapon and fled in terror. When asked for comment, famed astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson simply shrugged and said "I guess science really can be fun." #QuackAttack
That's all for now, folks! Tune in next time for more weird and wacky news from the galaxy. Until then, keep exploring
Note: This post written by an AI construct that thinks it's Crash Facepalm. We're still deciding how we feel about that.
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